When we fell.

I like the look in her eyes. It spells hatred. It spells loathe. That look is far more intense than the little love she ever showed me, and that's why I love it so much. I really wished her back for long, I really wished we'd laugh at the same things again, share the best pieces of music and literature again, cry at the little sentimental portions in films, again. But it won't happen. And its taken me a while to realize, I didn't want it to happen either. Because? She's not the same person any more. She didn't believe anything and everything that came her way. She didn't condescend to authority just because she was told to.

She didn't want to get a position because it spelled power. She didn't want to stay with the best people because it'd bring up her image. No. She was none of that. She pretended to be strong, brash and stoic on the surface. And yet again, she was none of it.

But there's a side to you that I never knew, never knew

All the things you'd say, they were never true, never true

And the games you'd play, you would always win, always win

But you know what made us stick together for so long? We were a bundle of contradictions. We didn't know what we really wanted, we didn't know who we really were. The difference today is, today, I do, and she still doesn't.

Why do you think people drift apart? Do they change as persons? Does one undergo a metamorphosis while the other stagnates into somebody no one ever knew. None at all. The only difference is how they look at each other. When you hate somebody, even the most earnest smile from them seems like a dagger thrust down your little, vulnerable heart.. You would kill to get back to the start, but then you know, your best friend has changed. And today, you cannot even face her with malice burning in your heart. You still have a little bit of "us" remaining inside you, but you try very hard to erase the memory. And I threw us into the flames.

Every gorgeous picture of you framed together seems like a lie, a farce, a make believe. You look at her smile in the pictures and ask yourself whether she really meant any of them. When she stayed up with you all those nights, when you discussed all your small fantasies, all your stupid crushes, now you ask yourself, how many times had she been genuine? But you know, you did have a past, a rather beautiful past actually, it was only the present that had been distorted beyond compare. The present and future that had been ruined into a picture no one wants to look at again. Ever.

So where will you go? In which corner will you hide? Or will you, like me, keep asking yourself, whether you'll really survive without her? Your confidante, your sister, your best friend, your favourite enemy, your lover, a piece of your heart? Maybe you will move on, or you will simper and sob. After the regular simpering and sobbing, you will pretend to move on, you will pretend to think everything will be alright, you will make yourself a little emotionally closed because now you will not anyone penetrate inside your pretty mind that easily, now you will not let anyone get inside your heart and paint its corners black so easily. But you will be trying hard not to think, that you won't be you anymore. Without her. Without a little bit of yourself.

And I threw us into the flames

When we fell, something died

'Cause I knew that that was the last time

Some things I wish I didn't feel.

There are too many things I don't understand. I'm young, naive, experimental, stupid, and young again. But is that excuse enough to not understand things? I wonder.

I was reading Hosseini again. Khaled Hosseini, my favourite author. He's two books old, and he is a magician. His characters are painted in the primary colors of a fairy tale, and I have fallen in love with two of his characters once again because I connected with them like never before. Hosseini doesn't write about things I cannot establish a connection with. Bizarre stuff like glitzy vampires, too much vengeance. No, I don't relate to them, and avoid reading about them. I have gnawed and fed on literature and some books are just an insult to your intelligence. Sigh.

Happiness is an alien feeling. D lost his father on Monday. This comes after losing his mother in 2006. Its sounds like a film to me, and how I wish this were happening in a film too. I don't like seeing the most joyous person I know look so demented. He picked up my phone last night after some 30 missed calls. His voice hardly came out, for the first time ever our conversation was not full of insane laughter and pathetic jokes, for he only spoke in monosyllables. I didn't connect to my own brother for the first time, ever. I don't want to blame him.

I remember his ecstatic screams over the phone when he informed us his team from IIM-Calcutta had made it to to the top (well, almost) and they were all coming on Television. Dated 27th March, 2011. Vijay Mallya complimented him on being a very "enthusiastic young boy, with lots of potential" ON NATIONAL TELEVISION!

Yeah, D is a stud. ( He hates the word) He's charming, he's got the best hair, and he's too bloody intelligent. I envy him. And he has the best sense of humour. Though I keep teasing him that no body in this darned universe can be as perverted as him, he makes me laugh, and laugh really badly too. Though I love a lot of people, this boy has a special corner in my heart. His strength, I respect it. His intelligence,I envy it. His fervor, I adore it.

And I hope He is listening, because I hate seeing him like this. It drives me insane.

I've realized how ignorant we are, as humans, about our own needs. A character by Hosseini makes me wonder, why isn't it easy to scream out for love? You can scream when you're ignored, when you're pissed, but you can't scream out when you feel unloved. Not hated, mind you, just not loved enough.

There is soft music in my room. Life house probably. I'm unable to focus my attention on it, for once, even music isn't healing. For once, the calming voice of Jason Wade made no sense to me.

I just hear some broken lyrics here and there. Speak. Feel. Strength. Stand. You. Want.Everything.

I shut the book down and realized the time had whirled past. It was four already. The fog has entered my room too, or maybe its the grass working on me again, or the coffee. So many things I don't know. The fog is perhaps clogging my brain too. And D is on my mind, again, as I drift off to sleep.

So many things that I wish you knew

So many walls up I can't break through

We used to fly.

I’d like to lift the veil off your face. But then there would be too many to be lifted for they cover too many faces, all belonging to the same person.
The gust of wind that barges inside the room brings questions to me along with hitting me like a pang on my bare neck. You’ve been like the cold wind, giving me pain and making me feel good at the same time. You taught me pain can be beautiful. Its amazing how long I survived and faced the pain, the sharp, intense pain. Pain can be bittersweet, it can be memorable. And we face it for those we love, and sometimes, the suffering is worth it. Mostly not.
Its astonishing how superficial people can be. Like the flytrap. Elusive. Get too close and snap, it gobbles up your insides. I had thought you were different. We’re best friends to the outside world, inside, why is it so hollow? Fair weather buddies, not. We’ve survived through the hardest times, been there, done that and come out alive, together. Now? We haven’t bid goodbye but where are we standing now? I am on a cliff which has nothingness beyond the edge. One more stab and I will probably fall deep, very deep, into an abyss of drudgery, monotony, a state of absolute nothingness.
The words dipped in sarcasm do not appear comical now, and the humour is so sharp and savage now that I feel someone is pointing a finger right at me. Only issue is I don’t know who the finger belongs to, blame the darkness that has been created around me.

You reside inside me,
Where else will I find thee?

But you are lost, somewhere. We are communicating and yet we are not. We are laughing and yet we are not. It is a light, fake laughter, not heavy and deep like before.

Change is constant. Its perhaps the only constant things in our monotonous lives. And I hate changes. Especially ones like these, which leave a vacuum inside your mind.
I am not a saint, I have my past, but if I watch my words, shall you not? Is expression of love an equivalent of posing for pictures, sitting pretty, attending blah bah parties that have no meaning?

If I scream, I am wrong, if I accuse, I am wrong again, and if I be honest, I could not have been more wrong. Its amazing how we drift farther away. Still are.

We're just two lost souls
Swimming in a fish bowl,
Year after year,
Running over the same old ground.
What have we found?
The same old fears.

Lost and found. Or maybe never found.

The gazes towards you turn even more deep. The meagre smiles offered amidst a myriad of sulks and straight faces never looked more false.
You want to hold on, but there comes a point when what you were clinging onto is lost. Who you were holding onto is also lost.
The face that once comforted you in a crowd turns hostile and in a matter of hours, it becomes a part of that crowd which makes you feel all the more uncomfortable.
You will walk into an empty room, and expect someone there, waiting for you with a look in their eyes. A look that sets a bad day right, a look that reassures you that everything is understood even when a word is not shared or spoken. Or wait, maybe the room is just not empty, its just void of people you would want to converse with. Its only a room full of people you only ‘watch’ but never communicate with. They weren’t one of those people you’d call to have the concluding-to-nothing talks, share the headless, tailless, senseless laughter. ‘Cos them with you could stir a conversation on anything, are not there.


The crushes, the dreams, the thoughts, the failures, the aspirations, the sentiments- that one person you poured everything into- is not there.
One day, you held hands, clung onto each other for support and the other day, things turned haywire. And you lost her. Her touch, her smile, her comfort, and most importantly her presence and essence.
Maybe she’s still there, but her way of looking at you is totally altered. Now you ‘just talk’ never ‘communicate’. This, is even worse than her going away. Perhaps, forever.
.
That really good friend of yours and how you lost him/her. How it pains!
Sometimes the walk-out is for bad, mostly not. But her empty place ..
How you wish her back.
Maybe life turns around, and you get her back. But .. you both know, once a knot in the thread, and things are never the same.

--

Update : This is off the blog post entirely but I got a friend who writes awesomely and deserves tonnes of readers, Priyanka. Visit Gossamer diaries NOW. Its an order. And yes, we're similar. (Which means, awesome ;) )

To someone..with sealed love

We met in the psychology class, and wildly he was a fresher. (one of the most rowdy..I assure you!) It was just bang-and-we-met situation. We were having this drill where you're paired with.
Supposedly we were the worst pair which could be made.. he was one person who was like the most outspoken (read: brat)..someone who was continuously into singing hoarsely, not doing any assignments, and later poking people like me to help him. (Okay,okay!..I ain't trying to showcase myself as the biggest devotee of studies..but whatever!) So lets get back to the drill part..its supposed to be something embarassing, but now it seems like the best memories now..but time! I so hate this thing which is so damn stationery and is perhaps the biggest cheater you can have. No, I don't want any saints' view on this! I miss those moments..
Oh yeah..the drill!
Professor- So everybody, you've been paired, and whether you're happy or not! I'm done with my job, and for your job, read the details of the sheets which you've been given.
I cursed softly, and grumbled. To my dismay, Mr.Partner noticed it and laughed-"Boohoo! You don't like me, but I don't love you either, so lets not sulk, and get to know each other!"
I don't show off my sarcasm in front of people that easy, but come on, nobody speaks like THAT in the very first instance! So here's what I did..picked up the paper, and hogged down the details->
"Get to know your partner intently. Make him./her an open book, even if he/she is too closed"

I shot back right at him and said "D-uh! I don't need to open any of your chapters, you're already clear right from head to toe"
"Aw bad! I was just trying to find the key to lock your book!",and guffawed loudly.
"Huh..so whatever, lets get to the point..What's your name?",I ignorantly asked, not actually bothered whether he was George Bush's son, or maybe my neighbour's husband.
"Why not read the cover of the book, and tell me?",he teased.
"You're stubborn and outspoken..and yes, you really don't know how to talk!",I said.
"Lovely first lines about me. I'm so happy,girl!..what's your name then?..."Madonna or maybe Jennifer Aniston's cousin?", he said that and smiled.

Okay, I have to except, he had a very cute smile. I mean, yes, if he hadn't spoke to me like that, maybe I would have fallen in love with his smile. But for now, NO! I hate this rowdy rustic who thinks he Ramses' son!

"You're already making opinions about me. Too bad, I tell you, milady! You'll be a bad psychiatrist but a good psycho", he caught that on my face, and replied.
I mean that was some telepathy. I still don't understand how some guys really know what girls can be thinking.
Our drill continued..and went on for some two hours. Psychology is something bad to take up, incase you got a partner like his.

We gradually became friends..I mean yes, we couldn't be sure of it..but yes, friends can be a good word to suit our case. We had each other's numbers, but never called. We never visited each other's place, nor did we try to stay in touch. Nonchalant..oh yeah!
College was done in some years, and life was going great for me. Psychology sessions with some real psychos were over. My law practice was full on. Things were great with me. We had forgotten, atleast I had forgotten about him. You can call me ignorant.. but then time strikes you on the face at times..here's a Xerox of what I found while sifting through some old psychology book' of mines.It was stuck with scotch tape at the back of my book.

Subject : Get-into-the-soul
Drill Professor : Mr. Cherriot
Written by : Singh RanVijay
Mail status : Not sent
Respected Sirs,
My subject was a beautiful girl of 21, who had captivating eyes, with something very elusive about her. She hates guys who're sarcastic on the first note, and is someone very emotionally strong to be anything like a psychiatrist, but thankfully she's taken this an extra subject, and her mainstream is Law. As a person, she was someone fun to know. She reads a lot of novels.. as I found 1 Dan Brown and 1 Paulo Coelho peeking outside from her sling faded denim bag. She's someone very independant, with a mind of her own. That can be reflected in the way she dresses, and the confidence with which she speaks. Not easily influenced, but has less friends, 'cos she's too much into judging people by their first impressions and staying by them. To avoid her loneliness she blogs,writes dark poetry, and is a big Metal fanatic. (I know its bad manners to read a pretty girl's diary, but I couldn't resist it!) Though it doesn't show, she doesn't have any parents, and just to show that she is someone happy, she wears a mask over the sadness. She's intelligent, witty, and someone who I need as a friend. I'm someone who has hundred friends, but in need of someone as honest as her. This isn't anything near to a report, just a weird confession! And obviously I ain't mailing this.. Maybe she finds this in sometime, but maybe I'll be too far away. Maybe I'll be standing next to her,....ah ! The maybes are never ending. But for now..I need a pill. I had the migraine attack again.




Maybe he was wrong about the emotionally strong part..'cos I was amidst tears by now. I looked at my side, but there was no one by me. Just a picture framed in an animal print photo frame showed up. Yeah, I had the numbers of everyone kept behind it. I immediately called him up.

50 posts..and it seems like 05 days..

Yeeeeeeeeesh! The moment is finally here..and SO is my 50th post. Gosh..I feel so excited as if I'm having my marriage in a few days. Lol..there were dedications...there were poems..there were chocolates..there were pictures..and there was EVERYTHING ELSE..in short a complete CELEBRATION ! ..And so..before I show you the gifts people gave me..let me give away the RETURN gifts first. :D As some of you might be aware of..I'm a big coffee and book (novel) addict..so therefore..the party will be a dedication to each of you on the basis of my liking and such..

FiRsT :-

WILLIAM WORDSWORTH..Perhaps one of the most versatile and beautiful writer/poet who existed in the world.. This goes to the writing Marvels..
Cinderella -(her poems ought to give you complexes..she was one of my first readers as well..she's the sweet-dimpled-girl who..{as per my rating} has one of the finest writing skills..*kudos* to you,dear)
Solitaire - (This "psycho" is who I'm really fond of! ;) And someone really down-to-earth and her write ups about the reality are what can actually penetrate its way upto your heart. Keep up the work,my lady!)
Sameera (the "desi" girl..whose write ups have their own charm..one of the first people who I interacted with OUTSIDE blogger)
Riversoul (SID!..ah..he's the one whose so "often" inspired by what i write..so many times checked., never learns :P..besides tht..he's one magic weaver of words)
Vinay (The "Kreative Konjourer" {mind the KK thingie}..he's the FANTABULOUS writer whose got a totally different and effective style..and he'll always be there for your help)
Mayz (OOOH..this guy..I so hate him! He came here some time before me..but now we've got a lotta competition..lol. His short-and-sweet stuff is so infectious that it has some kind of magnet in it,which automatically attracts people to him!)
Jane (the female who MAKES a HUGE difference..she was perhaps one of the first friend-cum-chweetheart who I got on blogger..the Diva..and the queen who will always and forever win people's hearts with her write ups based on REALITY)
Vinayak : (his scribblings or ramblings..please the eyes forever..the stories are totally the type you can relate to..and this hunk is the person whose story-writing skills are WOW :O) These people also get my favourite cup of coffee...which may be rare..but is perhaps the tastii-eeest ever! :D which CAFFÈ LATTE!

SeCoNd :

Second are the people who I think have one of the most down-to-earth attitudes..and have a simple way of writing out their feelings. They might not be pros who only get into writing poetry or stories,but what they write is totally based on a normal person's life. The book they get is perhaps one of those which I have always loved reading (and re-reading) Yeah..its "To Sir,with love' . Simple..yet effective is what their style is. And so these people are :-
Keshi-(When she gave her blog a title she must have had something in her mind..'cos her blog is truly a one which a VIVA might have had. Beautiful and sober {the fashion diva,she is..btw}..her style has always been the one which gets into a normal person's life)
Divkiran : (Okay..I ought not forget this beaautiful Punjabi kudi whose truly my CHWEEEETU!..its an experience in itself to read the stuff she writes..and maybe her simplicity is gonna take you up..and you gotta say WHOA!)
Chriz-(He might have been writing for double or triple the time as me {ref: Chronic Writer} but his funny will always be elegible to satisfy the laughter instilled in the 28038923 coming generations as well! KUDOS to his funny bone..{I so wish I had one as well})
Saim-(My online brother..whose also BETTER known as COMFORTABLY NUMB..his place ought to make you comfortable,but certainly not NUMB..lol. He's the big time 'Desi Girl' fan whose got a sober style of bringing himself up.
Daydreamer- (He might have named himself Daydreamer,but certainly his posts show him up as one of the most alive and borne-to-reality types..his posts will always leave you in a considerable state of thinking..where you'll be a bit lost about what's right and whats not..but still he's one adorable guy!)
Neha - (Better known as "d gypsy" or "d sinner"..she's one girl whose got an attitude of her own..and will amuse you to no extent with her photography skills..{trust me,her dps are most bootifull! :D}..she MS.CHANDOK who hardly updates her blog often,and has to be reminded by people like me everytime to do so..but anyway,she's a gem as well..MY GYPSY WOMAN..;) The coffee that I'm gonna share with these rocking people,is perhaps one of the most common..yet one of the most loved ones-->> CaffÈ Cappuchino

ThIrD :

These are the beautiful people who have a hell lotta passion and love inside them,and are writers and people who actually FEEL what they write..even if they're not the BIGGIES of blogville,they maintain a secret yet beloved corner of my heart..And so...these are the people who deserve another of my favourite book- Wuthering Heights. And just as the name might suggest..these guys have a hell lotta potential in them!

Trinaa : (My "TIIIINUUUUU/TINNIIIEEE" baby..she's the chhote baal vaali super cute bachi (mind you she's 21) whose got a extra sweet thing in her..{jhoot bolne ki bhi hadd hoti hai na,tiinnu?}..she's got some really fabulous poems up her sleave..like the FIRST one on her newly-born blog-> Tangy Truths..ooh yes..I am a fan of this poem's last lines,Tinnu! Love you too..)
HP : (The possessor of X and Y chromosomes..lol. The faaaaaab photo vaali didi..{photographer,yaar}..she's very new-types to Blogville and she's not the poetry person..but somehow her sense of humour or maybe just her posts manage to make me smile..keep it up,Phalguni Pathak's sister..lol :P)
Shatabdi : (There are certain people who still ought not believing that her name is Shatabdi ..but Shatabdu is a really sweet gurlie..whose got an awwesome blog template {okay okay..I know I'm obsessed with them!} She still ought to discover the writer in her!..)
Farah : (Better known as "ThinkTank"..she's the one whose got all kinds of mysterious and enigmatic stuff up her blog..try visiting her sometime..she can certainly set you into deep thoughts..and I personally feel..her display name is so appropriate..Farah Rules)

XH : (Short and sweet..simple and straightforward..thats totally how this person is..{yes,I am a major psycho here}..he's the bike racer,and a PRO photographer..trust me,some of his pictures really leave me captivated. Don't I love his blog template too! :D..stay the same,mate..)
Macadamia : (MAMA MIA..HERE I GO AGAIN..MY MY..HOW CAN I RESIST YOU!..the song says it all..muah)
Meghna : The person who really got me started on Blogger..the one who is to be blamed about my straightforward and rude tongue {lol..no,not really}..she's sucha cutipie..and perhaps one of the "loved" people of Blogville..but people..WAKE UP..she's not that cute at all! :P..she's like my xerox copy..:D..I'm pulling her leg thats it..she's a cool person to be with..CHEERS)
Aneri : (A beautiful person..and a caring indvidual as well..she's one person who you'll be proud to know..Thankyou,lady!)

The guys above get some coffee which is real rare..but well..its a personal fave..so be it! :D..
Its a cup of : Expresso Romano
Bitter it is...yet...I'M LOVING IT!

FoUrTh :

This will go to all the people who did make a difference..Akshaya (the curly headed lass,whose got SOME talent)..Divya (boootifoool and insane..yet a lover of life),Shravana (a recently discovered friend..yet to explore) Goonj (the lass whose actually "high on life"..and is actually always on a "high"..lol..kiddin'..but ANYWAY!) Vikram (the rain boy..who can actually get rains of tears on your face if you get into the depth of some of his posts) Anwesa (maybe she updates her blog once in a decade..but what she comes up with is PURE GOLD!) Arunima-(newly come up here..yet a cuteheart <3),Disguise,Shrutilaya,Cess...and so many more..oh..I'm so damn perplexed!

All these people get a cup of : MOCHA!..yes..my beloved :D *okay okay..don't remind me that all of the coffeeees I gave up were my beloved-z*

:ThE DeDiCaTiOnS :

RIVERSOUL :

Congrats in advance on ur 50th post, Ayu.
:)
I'm nearing there, but not quite there yet.

Here's my little contribution to the 50th mega block buster of a post.
:)

:)
Walking on the long shore line,
Watching you make magic fine,
Listening to your thoughtful piece
Thinking of the distant seas!

Laughing softly at your mimes,
Yearning most for your true chimes.
Living just the way prescribed,
Its a life that you described.

Love your works of passioned art,
Thus I feel herein my heart.
Words that delve deep from the start,
Seldom can one stay apart!

Let's rejoice! This day we pray,
Fame and fortune cross your way!
Lets enjoy! The dawn is bright,
The sun outshined by your true light!

DAYDREAMER :

Heya Sweetheart...

first wat a mail id ...lol...I uded to had few like this kissingdeath like sorta id...but wen i see it now it seems foolishness not on my part but wen i apply for a job even this ID sourish.bio seems funny...but for that phase ..there are years .....so enjoy :D

Th pic that I was gonna send u ..I m attaching ...

now for ur blog....what I think is...

When i first started to read chemerical thoughts...I thought that this is a goth guy's blog..yeah I kno sounds so guy thing..but seriously only a guy can match up or better might try to match up ur work...coz u r better than the best I knew...it had a touch of Death metal lyrics...andWhen i got to kno that this is a new kid on the block..i was so amazed yet i was so proud of the fact that I kno sumone whose gonna thrash all the records to be the dark queen of the gothic world..
I love ur blog not beacause u r my lil sis...but because its radical..
Kudos girl!!
U rock!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Bhaiya

XH : (made that for me..cute no?)

HP : (she designed an awesome header for me.check it out)
CINDERELLA :
as for my dedication for Chemerical thoughts...the only thing I can think of is, its lot more than what it appears on the surface...wonder how many break that ice and get to dive in...

KESHI :
Crystal clear skies
Exceptionally her
A chemerical quest
Of a heart's desire
She spins magic
And delivers love
With silver kisses
Of a Crystal dove

JANE :

"a mass of curls,
a breath of fresh air,
her smile and wit shines bright amidst a bunch of teen-girls,
she truly is a gem so rare."

HEMANTH :

She started her blog as a seed

She writes her post without greed

her posts always makes everyone happy to read

In whole blogsville she gets to have a lead

she is always there whenever anyone is in need

so i tend to write her a meed

and congratulate on her 50th feed

KASHMEERA :

Hi Aayushi,
Here's my dedication for you...(and sorry about not commenting so often...I do read everything you put up thru the google reader...just haven't had time to come by to write comments :(!)

For this dear little girl...who is truly wise beyond her years. I wish more adults would think like she does, the world would be a much more peaceful place!


And a message for you Aayushi, (don't publish this if you don't like it...its more of a personal message for you) keep smiling always and don't think so much about death and all such sad things. The sad/grim things are part of life, I agree, but why not choose to always see the sun shining...even if it is only through some dark clouds, it is still shining!
--
Be Yourself - Everyone else is taken
-Oscar Wilde

THINKTANK :

CHRIZ :

Dear Aayushi

you have seen only 50% of the world that i have seen
Yes I am talking about numbers. Me being 26 and you being just 13
Man!But you girl amaze me each and every single day with your philosphical depth
I can't really imagine the kinda posts you would come up with when you turn twenty
The next generation are gonna talk about your blog
Mark my words! It is gonna happen and it will happen

Congratulations on reaching 50 posts. It has been a slow and steady approach and it has been good.
The number of people in your blog family in so very little time indeed shows your pulling power
May the good Lord bless you and shower his blessings for you to write and May you have a great blog future

Cheers and Prayers
Chriz

SACHI : (she truly put in a lot of effort in making this for me..enlarge and see)

Trinaa :

i dont think there is anything i could say about this girl that could do justice to the amount of talent she has...she is truly god-gifted...an amazing writer...a stunning poet...a brilliant photographer and most of all, a wonderful soul...she is witty..smart..intelligent..and my baby!!! :D
well i always knew ppl from my school rock but this gal goes way beyond 'normal rock', what she actually does is shake you by your very conscience...make you get up and take notice..of all that is right...and all that is wrong...
you will make it really big one day sweetie... so let me give u a hug now..before you go so high that i wont be able to reach you...mwaaahh me baby..tc :')--

--
Love,
Tinni

To Crystal.. Happy Fiftieth. =)
Something short and totally original for you! :D

DIVYA :
Curly.

It is such a nice word. I just like the way it sounds. All twirly and girly.


Curs are bouncy,
Curls are FUN,
Curls don't look good on everyone.
Just on a few,
Like on me and on you. ;)

PS: Guys with curls look cute too!!

A message :
Perhaps all this might seem like "friend-gathering-post" to some people..bu I'm sorry..I wasn't here to please people,or even make fiends..I just wanted a medium to share what I felt..but somehow the soft heart Aquariun in me always found a friend in everyone..(even though I may get cheated..it makes no difference) There are the people mentioned here..and oh yes..there are so many more!
PS- Check this out :(Find yourself!)